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Blog 17 - Review

December 31, 2020


It’s been a while since my last blog. The gap is probably because things, for the most part, were the same. The UK was in lockdown and the days blurred into each-other. I think now is a great time to reflect on the time that has gone by. 


In July 2019, I joined a training course that promoted its’ ability to help graduates gain work at big firms. Five miserable unpaid months later, I left on a mutual termination of the contract and became unemployed. I was unlucky. This was during Brexit and there wasn’t many job opportunities. In November 2019, I had an interview with a really cool tech company but unfortunately, I didn’t get the job. I was unlucky, they picked someone with more experience. On the 6th March 2020, the country went in lockdown and I spent over 100 days alone. I was unlucky to be alone, trapped in my Nans’ flat. 


It’s so easy to see the negatives and positives in life as two different things. Seeing them as times when I was lucky and times when I wasn’t. It’s funny how you will never see the true extent of these things and how much positive an ‘initial negative’ can create in the long run or the very long run or the super long run, and how beautifully unpredictable these outcomes can be. Like how three mis-marked exam papers let me give up and settle on Dundee University, which somehow turned into friends that will last a lifetime and a sport I would never have heard of that has led me to travel around the country, and occasionally, the world. And, with this, how one terrible unemployment experience and over 100 days in isolation can turn into a flat, bought on my 23rd birthday. 


I have an idea of what the ‘super long term’ positives of 2020 may bring. There’s a great scene in the film ‘About Time’ that talks about the secret to happiness, and how it lies within the little things in life; the odd moments littered throughout ordinary days that are so easy to miss, and the importance of cherishing those small things. I will probably look back on 2020 not as a bad year, but as a year where I missed out on those small things. Things like sitting in the back of a mini-van, with my eyes sagging with each passing flash of a headlight, as my thoughts drift over to the adventures I shared with my teammates over the last two days. Things like the taste of overambitious drinks at parties I don’t even want to be at, but knowing that we’re not far away from over-emphatic conversations about things of relevance, old relevance or no relevance at all. It’s too easy to look back on 2020 as a negative year, but I think for now, it may be best to look upon it as the year that will make me value these little things in life a little more in 2021. Wishing you all a New Year, happy or not, that’s filled with these moments that you can cherish. And while we’re wishing- no more of this covid shite. Here’s to 2021. 
Johnny. 
PS- Knee ETA- February. Stay tuned.